Saturday, October 27, 2007

Shanghai Nights

China Eastern is a solid airline with service we poor Canadian are now unfortunately unaccustomed too. A free meal is always a good thing, and when it’s followed up with ice cream its smiles all around. One thing I noticed in Shanghai is its inhabitants love ice cream. I scream, you scream, we all scream for ice cream. There goes my stereotype that all Chinese are lactose intolerant. You learn something new every day. Upon landing and with time to kill, after all I have never visited the city and know no one, plus RGP is still in Seoul, I decide to pass on the taxi ride to the Hotel and opt for the Maglev train. A Japanese invention, the Maglev is a high-speed train that goes from 0 to 301 km/h in minutes. The 30 km ride to the city is over in less than eight minutes. Deciding to take the train adventure one step further I continue on via subway and is it ever packed. For those who do not know, Shanghai is a mega-metropolis with a population base that is equal to all of Canada in excess of thirty million. Hopping out at Zhongsong Station I scale the stairs and pop out into the city for the first time and the first thing I see is a man-vending pirate DVDs directly outside the station. A quick walk up the street, massive orange 80 liter Burton bag in tow, I hail a taxi. The driver stops in the middle of the street, loads my bag and we’re off to the Hotel. No need to say he does not speak a word of English, refuses to look at the map, and is on his cell phone requesting directions, shouting at whoever is on the other end of the line, jumping in and out of the car numerous times, yelling at people all the way to the spot, thirty plus minutes after I hopped in. The fare is a mere 30 RMB, which roughly translates too less than four dollars CDN and that include a healthy tip. RGP co-worker Mr. Bill, who studied in Shanghai, comes down for an assist and I’m finally checked into the Xi Hua Hotel. Staff here is some next level no speak English and each and every request takes multiple stabs before results. Put it this way, it took five calls and a translator for a laundry order to be submitted.
Riiinnng! Andrew A is on the line relaying the news that RGP missed his outbound flight from Seoul. I later learn Seoul has insane traffic and RGP spent half his time there in traffic to and from meetings at about $100 USD per ride. He says his ride to the airport the following day took three hours! Plan was to hit Bling for the Shanghai Baby Yu DJ set, but it is not to be. Word comes down that the spot is a forty minute drive each way and after all this traveling and the afternoon taxi adventure I’m not down for it. Option B it is and I join Andrew A, Julie, Mr. Bill and local Shanghai residents Stark and Hogan for some drinks.
Babyface is a multi-level club in the heart of the city and it is going off. In the twenty minutes we stay inside, our crew is refused bottle service (too busy) and I almost come to blows with a large club kid on some bullshit. Shanghai must be extra gangster, taxi drivers are all protected in their vehicles by either a mound of plexi-glass or barbwire, and outside the club there are five cruisers maintaining watch, while to the left a patron is being carried out by two friends partially keeled over. A shame, I was really looking forward to going through a bottle of JD and green tea. My drink of choice at home in the Dizzle, it is de rigeur here.
Redirected and parched, post yet another taxi ride, we find ourselves walking down an ex-pat section and into a straight up Gweilo bar with all female Filipino band knocking out covers, and a sprinkling of sensational and not so working girls. Five rounds later we’re on our way out and a young woman approaches our group and loudly yells, ‘Who wants to fuck!’. We opt for Ron’s and are inside one of a countless number of 24 hours McDonald’s that offer delivery. Ron is large in China. The Shogun Burger, an all-pork patty that winks at you, topped with wilted lettuce and teriyaki sauce was a complete bomb back in Hong Kong. Always in need to taste delicacies unavailable on the usual travels, I opt for the Quarter Pounder and cucumber sandwich with a spicy Chicken wrap on the side. Good stuff…
Sleep in and take a mid-afternoon walk up the street, past the University, to four corners of massive malls, overhead walkways, and true commerce in action. People are everywhere, on foot, bicycles, motorcycles, cars, taxi, buses, etc: Non-stop action, Pee Wee.
The phone rings at 10.45 pm. RGP is checked in and ready to roll out for some drinks. A veteran to the city and the Hotel he knows the ‘hood and we walk one block to a Japanese Hostess Bar. Mr. Watanabe greets us like old friends and sets us up with drinks and snacks in our own section. No hostess action because they only speak Chinese and Japanese. Since when did that matter? Two doubles and 150 RMB later we’re back out exploring the streets looking for trouble. China offers more massage establishments than we have Tim Horton’s, and nothing better than a two on one early am massage gets a man to sleep nice and easy. Sorry, no photos…

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

McCauley Culkin in Home Alone Hong Kong

The plan for this trip was to follow around RGP for all his meetings and see what adventures we could get into during down time. The plan for today is to hit Seoul, Korea for a whirlwind thirty-six hours. A big fan of Kimchi, I am real excited to be on the way to the mecca of Asian BBQ. Unfortunately it is not to be. The airfare clocks in at over $1G CDN and I’m out. That’s what happens when booking the day before and RGP is not a man into drawing up a firm schedule and booking flights in advance. Home alone like McCauley Culkin, I am faced with the decision of one more day in Shenzhen on the solo tip, or a quick Ferry across the water back to Hong Kong. Shenzhen can wait until another day. HK here I come…
RGP and I part ways at the Ferry and jump on separate ships. He’s off to the HK airport and Seoul. I’m off to Central and a quick taxi ride to the Cosmo Hotel in Wan Chai AKA Wan Chizzle. There is work to be done. This trip can’t be all shits and giggles. Hop on the laptop and send a stack of emails, then nap. Gio knocks on the door shortly before 9 pm and we’re off to Causeway Bay for a quick dinner at our fave spot. The city is flowing with people, vendors, and a slice of nightlife rarely seen in North America. Maybe, just maybe, NYC can rival HK for its nightlife. Toronto is relative calm in comparison. Following dinner we walk through CB and I marvel at all its livity. A man can definitely live here, no doubt. Did I mention one of Toronto’s finest, Baby Yu is spinning at M1nt in Lan Kwai Fong? We hit the room around 10.30 pm, too early for Yu’s set and opt to walk up the street to a wonderful lounge spot owned by a large UK man. The vibe and beats are real nice and the place seems to pop as we head out the door back to M1nt for Baby Yu. A members only club with various chapters and locations in Big Willie locales, no budget appears to be spared in its construction. From the fingerprint entry process to its shark tank M1NT is serious stuff, and so is the price fro drinks at close to $15 a glass and I’m not talking HKD. Gio marvels at what could be done if a proper Promoter ran the venue as we sit and slowly sip our glasses of JD and ginger. Local fave DJ Darryl is warming up the crowd, but honestly, it appears the main draw here is the clubs deep pocket members who host an array of ex-pat models and a bountiful group of beautiful locals. Peace scribe That Guy is the man responsible for booking and flying Baby Yu over to Asia for a series of dates. It’s HK on Thursday, Shanghai on Friday and Singapore on Saturday for the duo. A born hustler, That Guy is on to something. He has booked and flown numerous Toronto talents over the seas to Asia, including a great man who enjoys eating at McDonald’s every day and goes by the name Frank Nitty. Jr. Flow is up next with his club tour on schedule for early November. Set with the bar management, That Guy blesses Gio and I with a few rounds and we’re feeling real nice in no time. Yuta is in fine form, although a little light on the reggae but that’s to be expected in HK. Paul touches base with Gio and meets up with us inside for a drink. Off to Pool bar/lounge Racks. Outside is madness. There is a new Asian club soft opening in the same building on the third floor. We bypass and head up to the sixth for a drink. We bump into a few VanCity now HK people who know the DIPT crew and watch them get crunk. A former Mississauga resident shows off his prototype shoe design, who is currently working on a custom for KanYe. Gio is low on energy and opts to head home for a night of sleep. Paul and I head across the street and up the stairs to Sugar. Paul’s confidence level at 200% and well linked in the scene, we pass the long queue outside and drop inside pure shoulder-to-shoulder madness. Two quick Corona and we’re grooving to the sounds of DJ Darryl who makes the place go off proper dropping all the right Hip-Hop and R&B club bangers. Pure Asian, save Paul and I, this is the best club experience of the trip, by far. An hour and a few more rounds of Corona later, we head out the door into a taxi and pour out onto beloved Wan Chizzle. Fenwick’s or Neptune II is the question. We swallow a quick slice to soak up the liquor and walk down the stairs into Neptune II. Immediately a few friends saddle in and we catch up. They even inquire on the whereabouts of RGP. No energy to get live it’s time to head back to the Hotel to catch up on some sleep. On schedule tomorrow is a flight to Shanghai…

Raw like Shekou, Shenzhen

The next morning we are on the move again driving up the highway to the Xialingbei Industry Area in Liaobu Town Dongguan City located in Guangdong Province. Sit in on a meeting and work on the laptop while RGP lays down the law to the factory. Within an hour we’re on our way to what has been described to me as the Wild West of China, Shenzhen. We check into the Nan Hai Hotel, which is located steps from a local Police Station and the Ferry. Shenzhen is a city of change. Less than thirty years ago it was a fishing village on a major decline. Today it is a bustling metropolis with hopes to one day rival Hong Kong, and a population of over seven million. RGP hits Shenzhen every few months and even he is impressed at the constant change to the area. Sadly his favorite drinking spot is now a pile of rubble and we have to search out new vibes. Winding up in the Shekou Seaworld City Centre we sit for lunch and a few TsingTao. Put it this way. My days of sipping Heineken are done. TsingTao is now the green bottle to be coddled with affection. Guests of Peace HQ, kindly make sure to bring some over when sampling greens. Jerry Levy pops into my mind and we fall prey to a Massage sign. There is nothing better following an extended car or plane ride than a massage, and with a two hour private room appointment costing a mere 200 RMB it is definitely the move. Relaxed and refreshed we return to the Hotel and nap until 2 am. 2.30 am we’re on the streets seeking out drinks and all of that good stuff. We stumble into a local bar, play games with the staff, pop a few brew and decide to head back to the Hotel. On the way we are spotted and encountered by six hungry women, who physically drag us into their establishment. No joke, I tried to fight but to no avail. Inside is live. The game here is see how many drinks the foreigners will buy to bring up the evenings proceeds. Anything goes as long as the drinks flow and RGP is buying! Three women on each of us, back massage here, kisses on the neck there. RGP has them dancing on the bar, and as the drinks set in we see a flash here and a flash there. Like I said, shit is live. Five to six rounds later we head back to the Nan Hai. Sleep comes easy. Tomorrow is a new day. Who knows what delights it will bring

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Mainland China - TangXia, DongGuan, GuangDong

The Ferry ride to Shekou, Shenzhen is a quick and smooth fifty minutes. We pass through customs on the other side. Welcome to the Mainland. Shenzhen has to wait. Our destination is TangXia, DongGuan in the Province of GuangDong, two hours North. RGP and I post up outside the Ferry terminal and wait for our ride. Free WiFi, so it’s not all that bad. Unfortunately our driver got into a fender bender on the way over and has to wait for a new vehicle. Two.five hours later he arrives and we’re on route. RGP knocks out. I opt to stay awake and take in the sights of Mainland China. Driving is insane. There appears to be no lanes with traffic crisscrossing all over the place. (Quick flash-forward, the next day I catch a solo motorcycle rider driving down the up ramp. Shit is ill, son!)
DongGuan is a dust-riddled, industrial town with close to 700 00 inhabitants, most of them factory workers. We check into the Metropolitan Yiking Hotel and head downstairs for some feed, our party now consisting of Mr. Frederich and the lead Mechanical Engineer of the factory. Tepanyaki to the max, our seafood meal consists of an enormous ice carved sashimi boat, fresh prawns, crab, steak, and more. The head chef is behind the grill and she is a dime, a double for a lead in a Chinese movie. Wow. Sensational. The chow down is over the top other than the copious amounts of salt, MSG other spices, and pound plus of salted butter she heaps on. I must say a man is tripping in China due to all the MSG, some crazy dreams going down every other night. The crab is what strikes me the most about the meal. One minute it’s alive and the next approved and on the grill cut up in pieces. Involuntary muscle movements and down the hatch in less than five minutes. Following the meal, RGP walks me over the to the Chinese restaurant on site. There is close to fifty tanks full of goodies waiting to be enjoyed, from lobsters to prawns, to sharks and some fish I have never even heard of. Remember the episode of The Simpsons when Homer opts for everything on the menu including the fish that can kill you if cut one inch wrong? This is it! On the way back to the elevator an enormous door swings open and I glance inside to see twenty women lined up to greet whoever walks though, behind them a select few in full on kimono like garb. Welcome to the KTV experience Gman and his pops told me about, but not tonight. We head to our rooms and pass out. The accommodations are five stars to the max, a serious room for under 500 RMB per night. Be forewarned, the beds are hard. I guess this is what it feels like to sleep on a train like Boxcar Willie…
Tuesday am we eat breakfast and drive to the factory for a tour. There are over 900 employees on the line, 99 percent female, three floors of jobs, endless workstations and numerous sections. No sitting around smoking or joking, its all focus and work seven days a week, 8 am – 10 pm. One-year contracts include boarding in an on-site dormitory and meals, average age is twenty-three. Word is that’s what they want, work and more work. The pay? Plant Supervisor/Foreman Mr. Han says it’s secret. Shhhh… Mr. Han? Could he be related to GetJanet? I snap a photo and email it to her. She gets a kick but says no relation. He joins RGP, Frederich and I for dinner in the private room at the Korean BBQ spot across the street from the Yiking. Korean, he has lived in China for the past twelve years drinking Chinese Whiskey and working seven days a week until midnight keeping tabs on the operation, he looks fifty plus but is only thirty-five. Following dinner we sit in the lobby and enjoy some drinks. RGP heads to the washroom and spots a lobby shop. For sale inside is a tight collection of Louis shoes, rollers, Prada jackets, etc, and at about fifty dollars per unit the price is right. RGP says to hold off until we reach the pirate mecca AKA Shanghai. Frederich runs inside all excited. The talent is coming. Wah? No KTV tonight, he wants to sleep. Mama San marches out two, another Mama San two more, and Mama San three another two. Indecisive and wanting to view the entire roster we hem and haw. Mr. Han is having none of it. He ends the selection process and we’re off to our rooms. I swear Winny is related to half the country. Wake up in the morning and I’m in LOVE. If only The Barber could see me now…

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

More HK Tales...

Sleep. A man needs his sleep. Crawl out of bed past 6pm, get ready for some feed and head to the Sheraton across the Harbour in Kowloonl. Sit down at Morton’s. It’s the usual fare, same classic menu in all locations. Opt for the blue cheese riddled tomato and onion salad and smallest steak on the menu. Making a conscious effort to cut down on meat. It takes three days to digest and slows a man down major. Pacific Rim Peter picks up the tab. Good guy. He calls Dana Point in The OC his home. There’s nothing like The OC in my eyes. RGP and I head to the HK club district, Lan Kwai Fong and drop in for a drink at Club 97, pure ex-pats, all hip-hop, people of all ages getting down. Drink two quick Corona and we’re out. Dial a pay per view of Japanese flick Death Note and hit the sack…
It is now Friday, day eight on the road. A shave long overdue I pick up a razor in Central (cheaper than Canada for the same product). We visit a tailor and plan to head back for a measurement. Custom tailored suits can be had on the cheap within twenty-four hours. The deal here is pick a fabric, get a blazer, pants, and two shirts for 2980 HKD, or 4980 HKD using premium Italian Zegna fabric, which a serious deal.
Mong Kok is definitely my fave daytime spot in HK and without a doubt the best-named district. Let me hear you say it out loud and proud three times. LOL. It reminds me a Jackie Chan movie and I stand there waiting for an endless stream of Triad’s to appear and enact a martial arts ballet on some heads. Word is there are approximately 150 000 members in HK and they have their finger in pretty much everything. Paul (next day) says a friend of his stated her brother went to jail for an eighteen month span simply for asking someone on the street if they were affiliated. RGP says they do limited biz on the Mainland because if they attempted to step up their game the Chinese government would squash them. Pick up a lil’ somethin’ somethin’ at one of the stalls. Visit a dozen kicks stores, including Toronto Sports (two locations) and shoot pics of kicks for potential usage in the March Sneaker Edition.
Lunch in Causeway Bay is a real nice soup with fish balls and water spinach. Good stuff and at 16 HKD a fine deal. The ice tea is also a treat. A full glass of ice, half a sliced lemon and sugar for sweetening. Chop it up fine, sip and say ahhhh to a crisp refreshing taste. A short walk and we’re back at the Hotel. Plan is to hit the city hard in a few hours but we’re still low energy from Wednesday and end up walking over the bridge to grab the BBQ pork, rice and veg takeout container for 25 HKD. Order up the second installment of Death Note and finally close eyes at 6 am…
Saturday is the first day of the Hong Kong Electronics Fair. RGP is buckling down in meetings all day. Gio receives an invite to a seven- hour boat cruise birthday celebration in the Harbour and we taxi to Pier 7. Birthday boy Hiro is in good spirits. A premium denim designer, he is responsible for the entire WeSC denim collection and also manufactures denim for Armani. Limited heat on the boat, but good times and conversation nonetheless. We briefly dock at Aberdeen to pick up the catered Italian lunch with Champagne toasts, white wine, Heineken, sodas and more. Post meal a few people dive into the Harbour off the upper deck, including two Armani Mo’s from Italy in the requisite tight briefs. Jokes. Spend most of it speaking with Paul, Tuba player in the Hong Kong orchestra. The cruise ends at 5pm and there is a 7.30 performance of classic Opera Aida on schedule. He has lived in Asia for seven years, knows the place, speaks conversational Mandarin, and likes to get LIVE at night. Gio says he’s a pick-up artist extraordinaire.
Post-cruise we taxi to Shek O for a quick drink and Thai meal with HK playboy Gordon AKA DJ Yeodie. A fixture in the local tabloids, the man is LIVE. Check his MySpace page for an example of the talent he deals with on the regular. Wow. Peace scribe, That Guy now based in Taiwan, says Yeodie is the man who hooked him up with venues in HK. He was set to join us on the cruise but was arrested, fingerprinted and in custody the night prior for drunk driving. Shek O is a way cool beach community on the South mountain of HK. Watch out for “Savage Juice” all over the place, and my fave spot, Fuck Lee Market…
Sunday we stop by Causeway Way for a Chinese breakfast of fried fish, toast, tomato and mayo for 26 HKD and hit the HK Electronics Fair. RGP and Andrew hip me to some nice technology and hot items. Wireless so small a magnifying glass is required to peep the details and Toronto company Kleer offers up an alternate wireless solution to BlueTooth. I pick up on the Gweilo powered speaker mono bass. Gweilo roughly translates to White Devil AKA your man, Mr. Heller. Gio models a dope watch that screens movies. Smile at a few booth babes and we’re out. PM Gio and I drop into the legendary Fenwick’s but become disappointed. It’s all man and man in for the Fair. Walk over to Neptune II and it does not disappoint. Paul meets up with us and we head over to Lan Kwai Fong to pick up some smoke. Labon is real chill, he lived in Montreal and Toronto. We sit, bun a few and head end up back in the infamous Wan Chai district for drinks at a pub, Guinness on draft and all that good stuff. Bedtime for a fewm but decide to head across the Harbour to Kowloonl. This is the real HK, early am, Triad’s sitting on chairs playing Mah Jong, littered streets like in the movies, grime. We head in and out of buildings on various streets, up and down the stairs. Sit down and speak with a few locals, and finally head back to the Hotel for 5 am. In a few hours RGP and I will be on our way to the real China, Mainland here we come…

Friday, October 12, 2007

Welcome To Hong Kong

Monday we head to the airport and prepare for the long haul to Hong Kong. This will clock in as the third longest flight in my time at 13.5 hours, following Jo-Burgh and Melbourne. Speculated upgrade is a no go. Seated in an aisle seat, so it’s not that bad. RGP manages to switch up front of the Coach section to a window. I get blessed with a switch to aisle bulkhead with legroom for days to accommodate a husband and wife team. Despite my restless nature the flight goes well and time seems to pass quick. Snacks, two drinks, a couple of naps, iPod, a little reading, and we’re in HK (not be confused with Hot Karl J).
Due to the time change, twelve hours ahead of the T Dizzle, it is now Tuesday pm. Quick check-in to the Renaissance Harbour View in the Wan Chai district and we hit the streets. Grab a couple of Guinness at a pub, Neptune I, sit and chill. People are real friendly. A stunning woman from Cambodia sits beside us and initiates a conversation. Her Thai friend appears from out of nowhere. Nice girls. Less than ten minutes in, the Cambodian woman states her friend is interested in getting married to me. I even hear the phrase ‘long time’ somewhere in there. And like we all know, no one says a better ‘long time’ than a Thai or Cambodian woman. Wow. I am speechless. Should I fly her home and put her in the kitchen. I really enjoy Thai food, and it will probably be easy to get her a job under the table at one of the three Thai spots on my block. She writes down her name and number and it is possibly the greatest name of all time, “Nike”. Happy days are here again. Head back to the hotel and sleep comes real easy…
Wake up past noon and hit an official Chinese restaurant for a major spread of Duck, Dim Sum, Seafood, Rice, Soup, and washed it all down with Chinese tea and Coke Light. Enter Gio. Fresh off a flight overseas from Chicago, he is a little tired, but ready to roll nonetheless. We hit the new iSkin office in Chai Wan, not to be confused with Wan Chai. Then head over to Gio’s new living quarters in another section of the building. Shit is live. Real deal Japanese motif, including dope Tearoom with mini chairs. We head to the Central district, buy Cigars and enjoy them in the Havana CafĂ© during Happy Hour.
It’s back to the Hotel like N2Deep. A ninety-minute nap, and we head out for an evening walk in our Hotel district. A quick bite at Heat and it’s time to get licked. We end up in Neptune II. Shit is LIVE. The band is classic. A G’N R cover fills the floor. When they break into Linkin Park, it’s a wrap. Look at that girl with the black dress and pink frills. We move about and post up. A crew of Filipino felines approaches. Chatty Cathy picks up on me, later with her, but not before leading her on for over two hours. RGP gets live and sets us up in the VI section with bottle service. Five felines follow and jockey for position. I decide to invite females from different crews to liven up the atmosphere. Could there be a catfight? I hope so. Chatty Cathy is beginning to annoy a man, but she’s fine. 6am rolls around and we’re a little loose but not juiced. Gio becomes ignorant with the women, disses his girl, but she’s back for more and they’re out. Word is she takes a dump and he ends up dismissing her. Meanwhile back at the club it is time to head home for a good sleep. I don’t know what happened, but we woke up past 6pm and the room looked like a typhoon hit it. I feel sorry for the maid…